35 Signs That You May Be a Hardcore Musical Theatre Fan

Yes, it's true, you may be a Hardcore Musical Theatre Fan if...

You know how many minutes there are in a year.

When anyone mentions Aaron Burr, you're compelled to add the "sir."

You know "Ya Got Trouble" by heart.

You've read the novel 42nd Street.

You have unusually strong opinions about the Best Musical Tonys in 1984 and 1988.

You know who Ethan Mordden and Peter Filichia are.

You know what a capybara and a phylactery are.

You've seen at least one major flop musical on Broadway.

Whenever you hear a reference to Austria, you sing in your head, "Austria! Count Ludovic of Austria!"

Your blood pressure rises when anyone uses the word soundtrack when they mean cast album.

You've seen and prefer the 1936 Show Boat movie, despite the fact that you have to fast-forward through the minstrel show.

You know the names of the plays that were the sources for Oklahoma!, Carousel, and The Fantasticks.

You own more than 200 cast albums.

You've seen Follies onstage more than once.

You've read Berlin Stories and/or Scenes de la Vie de Boheme.

You refer to the Oscars as "the Tonys for movie people."

You wish you could mention Avenue X without somebody saying, "You mean Avenue Q...?"

You hold out hope of seeing a live production of archy & mehitabel before you die.

You own at least two signed Playbills.

Anytime someone says, "God help us!" you say, "He will, John, he will."

You hate the Rent movie.

You often correct people on the pronunciation of entr'acte and reprise.

When you're alone at home or in the car, you sometimes sing "And I'm Telling You I'm Not Going" and/or "I Can't Make This Movie" at the top of your voice.

You watched all of Smash.

You have back issues of Show Music magazine.

You know why it used lots of skills for Dana Andrews to pass runes.

When you think of God, you see the Hirschfeld cartoon of George Bernard Shaw on the My Fair Lady poster.

You know that Andrew Lloyd Webber and Stephen Sondheim share a birthday.

You know there was already a sequel to A Doll's House.

You've read all the Shakespeare plays, but only so you can catch all the references in Something Rotten and Return to the Forbidden Planet.

You've considered a pilgrimage to Cave City, Kentucky.

Sondheim's The Frogs is on your Bucket List.

You've got a thing for Elaine Stritch and/or Bernadette Peters.

You have a strong opinion about which Wild Party you prefer -- and you hate the other one.

You don't think Spielberg should remake West Side Story.

If you do suffer from these symptoms, there is help. If you live in the St. Louis region, you've got New Line. We're here to help with all the latest musical theatre treatments. Side effects may include insight, understanding, self-awareness, wisdom, and joy. Find out if musical theatre is right for you!

Long Live the Musical!