12 Musicals I Will Do Before I Die

When we program a season for New Line Theatre, there are lots of considerations. Commercial potential is nowhere near the top of the list, but by necessity, it is on the list. After all, we have to keep New Line in operation, and you'd be amazed how expensive musicals are to produce.

I would love to do a season of really weird, really obscure musicals, but New Line probably can't survive doing that. Having said that, we have produced some extremely weird shows over the years -- Floyd Collins, Jacques Brel, Assassins (three times!), A New Brain, The Robber Bridegroom, Love Kills, Bukowsical, Celebration, Lizzie, Yeast Nation... I could keep going. For a long time.

So it's not out of the realm of possibility that eventually I could get to work on the twelve shows that follow. They're all really interesting, really well-crafted, really weird musicals that would be thrilling to work on, and that I really believe our audiences would like. But they're all somewhat or extremely un-commercial, and therefore risky for our budget. So you won't be seeing any of these on New Line's stage soon, but never say never...

Promenade -- This is the strangest musical I've ever encountered, and I want to produce it so much. It's sort of absurdist, sort of abstract, very silly but dealing with very serious subjects. We've done some crazy musicals with New Line, but nothing we've done compares with the lunacy of Promenade, in terms of sheer audacity and outrageousness. But it was very successful commercially off Broadway, so I think our audiences could handle it. It's one of those shows where you just have to hang on and go for the ride. I love shows like that!

Mack and Mabel -- Jerry Herman wrote the scores for Hello, Dolly!, Mame, La Cage aux Folles, and several other great shows. But his masterpiece is the dark and challenging Mack and Mabel, about the tumultuous relationship between silent film director Mack Sennett and his drug-addicted star comedian, Mabel Normand. It was originally a big Broadway show, but I am determined to bring it down to human size. As far as content goes, this couldn't be more New Line.

Ghost Brothers of Darkland County -- the brilliant supernatural musical thriller from Stephen King and John Mellencamp based on the true story of two brothers, one woman, and murder. The second they release regional rights, we're doing it.

The Crazy Ones -- the brilliant, inventive musical by Zack Zadek about the founding of Apple Computers. It's one of the most interesting, original scores I've heard in a long time. The show has not yet been produced, but someday we will do it.

The Visit -- If you thought Cabaret, Chicago, Kiss of the Spider Woman, and The Scottsboro Boys were dark, then you haven't seen Kander & Ebb's The Visit, truly the darkest, most distrubing musical I have ever seen (and remember, I directed Love Kills!), but also fascinating, complicated, deeply human, and weirdly beautiful. I will direct this work of dark genius someday.

Doonesbury -- Cartoonist Gary Trudeau and theatre composer Elizabeth Swados created this musical based on his Pulitzer Prize winning comic strip. But for some reason, it doesn't really work. I have a video of the original production, shot for TV (?), and I think maybe the Broadway production tried too hard to be funny, to be cartoony. Maybe the answer is to play it all very straight. Or maybe the answer is the material just isn't that strong. I'm not sure which. But I'm really drawn to this show, and someday I will figure out its weird mystery.

Shenandoah -- this is a beautiful, incredibly well-built musical drama, based on the famous movie about one family struggling unsuccessfully to stay out of the Civil War. It's a magnificent show with a great score, but I don't know if it's possible to shrink it down to our proportions. I would really love to work on it.

In Trousers -- this is the first chapter in Bill Finn's Marvin Trilogy. People often perform the second chapter, March of the Falsettos, and now there's the full-length Falsettos, which combines March with the third chapter Falsettoland. But hardly anybody ever produces the brilliant, quirky, wonderfully odd In Trousers. One of these days, I will.

The Life -- this is the fierce jazz-rock opera from legendary composer Cy Coleman (Sweet Charity, Little Me, City of Angels, Will Rogers Follies, etc.) about the hookers and pimps in and around Times Square in the 1970s. Lots of juicy roles for great singers and some serious Grrrl Power.

Little Me -- this is one of the funniest shows I've ever seen, based on a fake memoir by the author of Auntie Mame, about a young women who repeatedly marries rich men who then die. If that isn't funny enough, all seven men she marries are played by one actor, Sid Caesar originally, but wouldn't Zak Farmer be amazing in that?

Promises, Promises -- this is one of my all-time favorite shows, based on the brilliant film drama about a junior executive in a big company who loans out his apartment to senior executives for their affairs. With a very smart book by Neil Simon and an electrifying score by Burt Bacharach and Hal David, this is a cynical, brutal, morally complex, funny musical, and it's everything I want my theatre to be. We will produce this show at some point.

Faust -- is Randy Newman's nasty, funny, cynical, outrageous retelling of the Faust legend, this time with God and the Devil wagering over a slacker college kid. Every number in the score is amazing, and it's probably the least uplifting musical I've ever seen, but it's also really funny and really insightful. The original version Newman released is so perfect, but the show has been staged -- and tinkered with too much. I hope it returns to something close to its brilliant original form.

If you've seen my other lists, you know I never adhere to my own rules. So in addition to those twelve, here are my Runners-Up, also shows I would love to work on, but not quite as fervently as the ones above -- On the 20th Century, Starmites, Fiorello!, The Blue Flower, and Philemon. All worth checking out!

What else do I have to do during the Great Pandemic than dream about future seasons?

Well, the one other thing is write about my beloved art form. You can check out all my recent musical theatre books here. They'd make great Christmas gifts. Just sayin'.

Long Live the Musical! Stay Safe!
Scott